Clip and save: Your month-at-a-glance Moeller TV Listings
Summer resorts are shuttering, and the kiddies are back in school. It's time to enjoy a fabulous month of television. TV Guide has dropped its program listings, but I've jumped at the chance to fill the void, minus the fashion critiques, the drug company ads, and the venerable crossword puzzle.
Cheers to Chris Moeller for keeping the TV listings tradition alive.
Jeers to CNBC's "The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch." That show sucks!
Viva la McEnroe!
The Listings (all times central)
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Fri. Sept. 2- Daily Show correspondent Stephen Colbert guests on Letterman.
Mon. Sept. 5- The Cardinals and Cubs begin a meaningless three game series with a Labor Day matinee from Busch Stadium. (1:15pm on Fox Sports Midwest and WGN)
Tue. Sept. 6- Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld visits Letterman.
Thu. Sept. 8- The NFL Season begins with New England hosting the Raiders, preceeded by a "Salute to Heroes" celebration (I'm guessing.)
Fri. Sept. 9- This month's installment of "CostasNow" debuts on HBO (8pm)
Sun. Sept. 11- "The Simpson's" 17th season premieres on FOX. Alec Baldwin's voice returns, but Kim Basinger's sultry Southern drawl presumably does not.
Thu. Sept. 15- It's the premiere of "The Showbiz Show with David Spade" on Comedy Central.
Thu. Sept. 15- The Cardinals and Cubs begin another meaningless late season series, highlighted by a matchup on the FOX Game of the Week schedule, Saturday, the 17th.
Sun. Sept. 18- Turn Back the Clock day in football. The NFL's second week finds the Rams in Phoenix to face Bill Bidwell's Cardinals and former Rams QB, and two-time League MVP, Kurt Warner. Kick-off at 3:15 on FOX-- or regional action!
Sun. Sept. 18- "The 57th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards" airs on CBS. Host Ellen DeGeneres returns to the pageantry, along with the voters' bias against cable programming.
Mon. Sept. 19- "Arrested Development" begins its third season on FOX with a move to a new night and time. (7pm) Watch it this year, or I'll show up at your house.
Tue. Sept. 20- "According to Jim" returns. September 2005 marks four years since the 9/11 terrorist attacks,
five since the debut of "According to Jim."
Tue. Sept. 20- NBC's promising "My Name is Earl" premieres at 8.
Wed. Sept. 21- PBS' "American Masters" series profiles Lucille Ball. Check local listings.
Thu. Sept. 22- Chris Rock's "Everybody Hates Chris" drops at 7 on UPN.
Fri. Sept. 23- The incomparable Alicia Keys brings back the "MTV Unplugged" series, with a performance recorded in July at the Brooklyn Academy of Music.
Fri. Sept. 23- "Viva Baseball," on Spike TV. Filmmaker Dan Klores presents a celebration of the influence of Latin baseball players in the US. (8pm. Re-broadcast on Saturday and Sunday, if you were watching
Ms. Keys.)
Sun. Sept. 25- "Curb Your Enthusiasm" returns to HBO for a fifth season- the first episode entitled "The Larry David Sandwich." It's followed by the premiere episode of Ricky Gervais' new series, "Extras."
Mon & Tue, Sept. 26-27- "American Masters" airs Martin Scorsese's feature-length documentary "No Direction Home: Bob Dylan." Check your local PBS station. (
This is roughly the way my hair will look in two weeks.)
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HBO's "Rome" and "Real Time with Bill Maher" each air new episodes throughout the month of September.
Out of the Hollywood limelight, production continues on new seasons of TV's two best series,
Deadwood and
The Sopranos; and a big announcement will be made during the month on this blog regarding a 4th Annual Moeller TV Festival.
Sex acts in hotel rooms
Salon predicts we're going to see an all-out war in the very near future between "the National Nannys"--
my phrase-- and the broadcast industry. The new FCC commissioner, Kevin J. Martin, has close ties to Religious Right policy directors and the Bush White House. He's vowed to fight for stiffer indecency fines and an expansion of broadcast standards to cable and satellite radio and TV.
It's baffling to me how the FCC could even think of exercising jurisdiction over programming outside the over-the-air spectrum (the courts will never allow it,) but Martin is demanding of media companies, a new "family-friendly" tier of cable programming.
Who will decide what's "family-friendly?" That's my first question. Right now, by the letter of the law, "contemporary community standards" dictate, i.e. the American public and the free market system. My guess, though, is that under the proposed changes, a significantly smaller group of citizens-- perhaps, even smaller than the FCC, itself?-- would be heading the all-new indecency task force. Might it even be the executive members of one or more of the special interest groups already lobbying hard for restrictions in Washington? It's
their country, after all. Just ask them.
As the linked article above points out, the Family Research Council is at the forefront of the movement. Their legal director claims he was forced to watch "hardcore pornography" on three separate channels of the television in his hotel room-- only one of which, it seems, was a pay station. That would mean he found hardcore pornography on
basic cable? Jesus, I wish! Maybe in Europe?
For all we know, kissing and hand-holding offends this guy. Maybe he's on the staff of Bob Jones University and his channel-surfing produced a depiction of interracial dating.
"I don't have cable just for this reason," the man said, proving the effectiveness of the free market system.
Notice that these groups have also pushed boycotts against shows like "Everwood," because they feature story lines about birth control or abortion. Now we're moving beyond the debate over indecency into a debate about ideas. Political and moral
ideas. To them,
divergent political and moral ideas. And, herein, lies the ruse. Their movement is not really about protecting kids from smut. We've already perfected technology that does that. It's called the V-chip. It's about sheltering already-sheltered children from opposing ideas-- limiting their capacity for independent thought and discernment so that they'll be more likely to believe in an old man with a long beard who sits in judgement in the clouds.
See, I have ideas, too. Ideas I have a goddamn right to have. And, boy, would I like a cheaper cable package that catered exclusively to those ideas. I could ditch all the empty-headed cable news channels, the money-grubbing preacher channels, and "According to Jim." Then, I could finally afford that long-coveted "Skin-amax" upgrade.
But, alas, it won't happen. Democracy's a bitch.
Katrina and the Waves
It's a busy night with both laundry and a trip to the grocery store. (That's a week's activity for some elderly people.) But here are a couple favorite moments from today's Hurricane Katrina television coverage:
FOX weather chick: "The situation in New Orleans has the potential to be horrific."
Geraldo Rivera: "Would you say it could be hell?"
Weather chick: "Uh, yes, I guess so."
Rivera: "So we have hell and high water."
Weather chick: "Oh, yes... ha, ha."
Shepard Smith in New Orleans: "You're live on FOX News Channel. What are you doing?"
Man: "Walking my dog."
Smith: "Why are you still here? I'm just curious."
Man: "None of your fucking business."
Smith: "Oh, that was a good answer, wasn't it? That was live on international television. Thanks so much for that. You know we apologize."
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From the other end of the genius spectrum-- a snippet from the Des Moines Register's new humor columnist, Ken Fuson. His piece today marked the beginning of the football season:
YOUR TEAM chokes.MY TEAM tries too hard.YOUR TEAM has cheap-shot artists.MY TEAM has hard hitters.YOUR TEAM'S players can't spell their own name.MY TEAM'S players have learning disabilities.YOUR TEAM abuses steroids.MY TEAM pumps iron.YOUR TEAM'S coach cheats.MY TEAM'S coach does what it takes to win.YOUR TEAM has dumb jocks.MY TEAM has student-athletes.YOUR TEAM gets all the ref's calls.MY TEAM finally catches a break.YOUR TEAM has dirty playersMY TEAM has colorful characters.YOUR TEAM'S coach plays felons.MY TEAM'S coach believes in second chances.YOUR TEAM'S fans are drunks.MY TEAM'S fans are rowdy.YOUR TEAM pays its players.MY TEAM helps players find summer jobs.YOUR TEAM'S announcer is a homer.MY TEAM'S announcer is the voice of the fans.YOUR TEAM runs up the score.MY TEAM plays all four quarters.YOUR TEAM hires call girls for recruits.MY TEAM enlists volunteer campus "hosts."YOUR TEAM'S players are natural athletes.MY TEAM'S players are all heart.YOUR TEAM has fat cat boosters.MY TEAM has loyal supporters.YOUR TEAM has no chance to win the Super Bowl.YOUR TEAM is the Minnesota Vikings.
Think ahead, fall back
The big weekend has arrived. Don't forget to turn back your clocks early Sunday morning. What's that
? This weekend, you ask? Ohhh, you must have thought I was talking about the end of Daylight Savings Time? No, no, no. I was talking about a special edition of "The Baseball Show on KXNO," beginning an hour earlier, 4pm Central, this Sunday night.
We'll be broadcasting live from the new KXNO skyline studios in downtown Des Moines. The Iowa Cubs follow with a 5:30 pre-game show, and the first pitch in New Orleans at 6:05.
Get your fill of the show this week. The I-Cubs have a doubleheader scheduled next Sunday, and after that, we'll be fighting the NFL broadcasts for air time. (Also, there's a good chance the internet link will be shut down after the I-Cubs' season ends.)
See you there!---
This week, Dusty Baker shared with the Chicago Tribune the advice he got from Hank Aaron as a young player about hitting against Cardinals' great Bob Gibson.
"Don't dig in," Aaron advised Baker, "He'll knock you down.
"Don't stare at him. He doesn't like it.
"If you hit a home run, don't run too slow, don't run too fast.
"If you happen to want to celebrate, get in the tunnel first.
"And if he hits you, don't charge the mound. Because he's a Golden Gloves boxer."
Other than that, have some fun out there.
Can I still get a reference?
The story about the Manhattan maid who looted the homes of her rich and famous clients plays like a sequel to "Down and Out in Beverly Hills"-- a more entertaining "Maid in Manhattan." The woman reportedly told police upon her arrest that she only stole from people who failed to show her the proper respect. The deceitful domestic relieved Robert DeNiro's wife, Grace Hightower, Candice Bergen, and Renee Rockefeller of many of their valuables, while international charmer Isabella Rossellini was spared the washer's wrath. (Take that, Liz Smith.)
It's always slightly enjoyable to watch the elite take a lesson in the practicality of respect, but this behavior
does seem like a pretty cut and dried violation of the employee/employer social contract. Yet, I can't help but think-- that
Isabella Rossellini is just adorable.
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Here's an interesting tidbit from the sports world north of the border. More than five thousand members of the Canadian Media Guild (camera operators, directors, and announcers) are locked out by the CBC television network. As a result, Canadian Football League games are being broadcast without commentary. The audio of the broadcasts amounts to nothing more than the natural sound of the arena.
Growing up in a family with a satellite dish, we used to stumble across the raw feeds of baseball telecasts, and I always found the viewing experience an enjoyable one. The absence of narration and commentary heightened the energy of the crowd. If I can't get a Vin Scully, Bob Costas, or Joe Buck, I'd just as soon go without. Alas, Salon.com's
King Kauffman believes we're stuck with the Chris Bermans of the world as long as the networks need announcers to read promos and sponsorships.
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I stumbled across Ross Verba's name on the internet tonight. The Des Moines native is a former Iowa Hawkeye and NFL offensive tackle trying to catch on with a club for the '05 season. According to the major daily in Akron, OH, Verba's popping off last year about his employer, the Cleveland Browns, led to questions about his character. The eight year veteran is currently attempting to improve on offers in the one year, $1 million range.
On Wednesday, the society page of the Las Vegas Review-Journal had Verba "tossing about $800 in $1 bills into the crowd and at go-go girls at ICE (nightclub) on Saturday night.
"Verba, who reportedly blew a half-million-dollar Palms jackpot at a Green Valley Ranch pool party last month, was overheard offering the ICE deejay $7,000 to play an extra half hour."
Ross, maybe it's time to come home and visit the folks.
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This is kind of a
fun article. Despite their recent slump, Richard Roeper still believes it's the White Sox year.
But the Cubs fans at the Heckler break the situation down
this way.
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Joke of the day: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic?
A guy who lays awake all night wondering if there is a dog.
What's goin' on?
Things are sure changing in law enforcement. I got pulled over for speeding Sunday night in Fairfield, IA, returning home from the weekend Cards' games.
The Fairfield city officer approached the vehicle, and asked me if I knew why I was being pulled over. Speed, I guessed. I had my vehicle registration and insurance certificate ready to hand over with my license, and the officer looked at those items briefly, but he seemed more concerned with identification. He asked where we had been, and then quizzed me on the outcome of the day's ballgame. He asked each of my two passengers for their IDs and then took the three drivers licenses back to the squad car, handing back my registration and insurance card. This seemed very odd. I knew it meant that I would not be getting a ticket, but I was alarmed.
Why does the officer need to see the IDs of two men who weren't driving? Is he even allowed to do that? What sort of personal information does he have access to in his car? How do I find these answers?
It may have been a random check for illegal immigrants. We were a half hour's drive to Ottumwa, a city with a large Hispanic population working in the local meat-packing plant. I felt very violated. He was surely checking for any outstanding warrants (of which I have none.) But what if I had been the chapter president of an organization called "Iowans for Peace." I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure that, under the Patriot Act, he could attain that sort of "shared" information from the FBI right there at the scene of the traffic stop. What recourse would I have if this officer just wanted to fuck with me?
This is what African-Americans are always talking about. You can be pulled over in violation of a law everyone is guilty of breaking. Enforcement of speeding is utterly capricious in this land, considering that a "speed maximum" posting is treated universally as a "speed minimum." And a police officer can make your life hell simply for sport on the basis of that initial charge. The whole episode made me very conscious of the potential for abuse in law enforcement. It reminded me that, as a citizenry, we should always keep that authoritarian power on a short leash.
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Since September 11th, 2001, our federal government has frightened the American public into accepting draconian restrictions on their individual freedom, all to cover up our politicians' own failures on the job. Call me cynical, but hasn't it been firmly established that American intelligence already had enough authority to detect and stop the hijackers before the attacks on 9/11, even without a Patriot Act. The CIA report read "Osama bin Laden determined to attack," if I'm remembering correctly. Yet, somehow, these "blameless" politicians are still being permitted to deny our individual privacy, squash political dissent, and push radical immigration restrictions, even upon our long-time, peace-loving neighbors.
Yesterday, Iowa's radical right-wing Congressman Steve King proposed that a 10 foot high chain link fence topped with razor wire be built between the US and Mexico, stretching 2,000 miles and costing $680 million. King explained Monday that he had just returned from China. There, he had admired the Great Wall, but was not yet ready to propose a full-scale wall to separate the US and Mexico. I guess that should be of some comfort, since that wall worked out so well for the Chinese, keeping them isolated from the Western Enlightenment for centuries. But then, that prospect would probably appeal to a philistine and a war-monger like King.
I'm in a state of perpetual amazement that a group of people professing to be so patriotic could have so little confidence in democracy's elasticity and endurance. They're nothing but scared little children.
Cowards.
And cowards we don't need.
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The "War on Terror" continues to be a boon for corporate America. The Metro Transportation Authority in New York City on Tuesday awarded a $212 million contract to defense contractor Lockheed Martin to beef up subway security with video cameras, motion sensors, and cellphone service. (A nationwide surveillance system should be just around the corner.)
Some of the more disgusting displays of corporate greed and exploitation came in the immediate aftermath of the Sept. 11th attacks. Lockheed was among a group of contractors that hovered over Washington and lobbied for major increases in defense spending, ultimately succeeding in pushing the military budget to half of the entire federal discretionary budget. The insurance industry pushed for caps on payments stemming from the tragedy. The airlines scored $5 billion in cash from Congress, and another $10 billion in loan guarantees to solidify the industry and improve security, even after their leaders had rejected citizen action safety proposals for years, including measures that would have bolstered cockpit doors and latches. The drug companies even stuck their noses into the trough, lobbying for patent extensions under the cover of preparing for anthrax and smallpox threats. (Source on this paragraph: Ralph Nader, "Crashing the Party.")
Our foreign and domestic policy continues to be funded by these companies' direct contributions under a system of legalized bribery.
"They [the corporations] are counting on your patriotism to distract you from their plunder," journalist Bill Moyers has written, "They're counting on you to stand at attention with your hand over your heart, pledging allegiance to the flag, while they pick your pocket."
My Day off
As my title editor told you, I have the day off from work. What to do? Hey, I'll surf the web.
Here's a hilarious and fascinating website, tipped on Slate.com. It's
www.overheardinnewyork.com. It's comprised of completely anonymous, "overheard" street-chatter on New York streets and subways. Slate calls it, "an immense grass-roots sociological experiment, a deeply profound (and yes, often moronic) verbal profile of the 21st-century urban-American street." It's pure poetry.
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Here's more dialogue for you, a sample from the new HBO comedy series, "Extras," debuting in about a month in the Sunday night slot following the all-new fifth-season episodes of "Curb Your Enthusiasm:"
Ben Stiller, playing the director of a film about a modern day genocide:
"What does money mean in real terms if I find a little orphan child hiding in a building whose parents have been killed? What can I do to reach him? Sure, I could pop 'Dodgeball' on DVD and it would make him laugh for an hour and 32 minutes and escape reality, but then it's back to reality and what do I do then? I could put on 'Dodgeball' again, and he could laugh and see things he didn't see before. It's supposed to be like that, it's layered."
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Here's a headline from Thursday's Washington Post:
"Last living Marilyn Monroe husband dies in Calif"
Are these guys Confederate widows? What's the deal? There were only three Monroe marriages. The obit should have read-- "Marilyn's first hubby dies- the one you've never heard of."
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The Pamela Anderson Roast on Comedy Central Sunday was the highest-rated show on cable for the week-- with four million viewers. The program was a pleasant surprise for me. They didn't go back to the Friars, but it was the best network-produced Roast to date, bringing back the Friar Prince, himself, Jeffrey Ross.
The top 3 performers this night-- 1) Ross, 2) Sarah Silverman, 3) Greg Giraldo
My suggestion for the next Roast-ee-- Tom Arnold
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How firmly established is the good 'ole boy system for white coaches in sports? Former Baylor men's basketball coach Dave Bliss is a finalist for the head job of the (Bismarck) Dakota Wizards of the CBA. Only two years ago, a Baylor player named Patrick Dennehy was murdered by a former teammate. An assistant coach secretly recorded Bliss trying to persuade members of the team to portray Dennehy as a drug dealer to cover up illegal payments made by the university. Not only should Bliss be kept out of organized basketball, I'm trying to figure out why he's not in prison.
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The NFL's Randy Moss tells us this week that he smoked marijuana in his past, and still does "every blue moon, or once in a while I might." Let me take a guess about how the American public will react--- Zzzzzzzzz. And as well they should. But let's take this opportunity also to once again acknowledge the enormous gulf between our country's cultural mores and the laws on our books. A privileged man in America can acknowledge illicit drug use in his past, and still be elected president. For others, the same behavior, when proven, is punishable by imprisonment and life ever after as a convicted felon. Let's be straight about the fact that the criminal justice system in this country is a declaration of war against the poor.
The impoverished state of South Carolina has 54 prisons and one state college, with prisoners there now being rented to work for nine dollars a day in private industry. They've found a way to legalize slavery again.
I'm getting too worked up. It's my day off.
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The Archive interns are begging me to share these facts with you-- Cardinals pitcher Jason Marquis grounded out in his third at-bat last night, snapping a string of six consecutive hits. He had a single and an RBI double earlier in the game (the double was his 8th.) The streak spanned a two or two night in his last start, and two pinch-hits between starts. He's now batting .373, with 25 hits, a home run, and 10 RBI. His next pinch hit (his fourth) would be a single-season record for a pitcher. Yet, he's the odd man out of the playoff rotation right now, dropping his ninth decision in his last 10 last night. If the Cards advance to October and both trends continue, expect Tony LaRussa to avoid using Marquis out of the bullpen so that he's available to pinch-hit.
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I am off "the Baseball Show" this week due to a previous commitment (baseball tickets purchased in March.) The program may or may not air in my absence.
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Jim Zabel joke of the day: "Did you hear? John Hancock died without life insurance." *
* - I'm not sure what this joke means. My initial reaction was that it had to do with the fact that people's signatures are referred to as their "John Hancocks," and the insurance industry never got him to sign because the expression wan't invented until after his death. But then I thought, maybe it's just that there's a life insurance company named after him. Maybe it's both. I think the first joke is funnier.
HBO buzz
HBO announced earlier this month that the Sopranos will be stretched to seven seasons. A 12-episode Season 6 begins in March, and creator David Chase says he will produce an additional eight episodes to begin airing in January 2007.
What can we expect in the spring? The New York Daily News reports today that the show is shooting a late season 6 episode at a new $350 million residential community in Jersey City, NJ, formerly the Jersey City Medical Center. This tells me that Uncle Junior is headed to the Alzheimer's ward.
Also coming soon to HBO, "Extras," a comedy about a "proper" actor who can only get work as an extra, starring Ricky Gervais, creator of "The Office" on the BBC. It debuts Sunday, Sept. 25.
"Real Time with Bill Maher" returns Friday.
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This is great.
Intern night: Baseball, by the numbers
The Man could use another night off from writing, so instead, I've turned the CM Archives over to our summer interns for the evening. These diligent interns have been scouring the web on my behalf in search of the wild and the wonderful in the world of baseball. Take it away, gang...
By Bill Yepsen, 22, Laredo, TX:Mr. Moeller, I remember you were a passionate advocate for Albert Pujols as mid-season NL MVP, and you gave him your All-Star vote the maximum number of times allowed by the league and the Ameriquest Mortgage Company. I've been keeping an eye on Pujols and the Cubs' Derrek Lee since the break, and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised by what I found...
(2nd half thru Tuesday)
Lee-- 33 games, .271 BA, 22 runs scored, 8 home runs, 17 RBI
Pujols-- 30 games, .336 BA, 31 runs scored, 11 home runs, 25 RBI
By Angela Stuart, 21, Lansing, MI:Mr. Moeller, One day at lunch (your treat,) you mentioned that you were blown away by the "substandard play" (your phrase) in the National League West. I've taken the liberty of comparing the West-leading Padres to other division leaders. On Wednesday morning, San Diego would have trailed the East-leading Braves and the AL West-leading Angels by 10 games each. That was the closest they stood to any of the first place clubs.
Here are the other deficits...
Boston- -11 games
St. Louis- -16 games
Chicago (AL)- -16 games
By Folasade Idachaba, 23, Abuja, Nigeria:Mr. Moeller, During one of our moonlight walks, you remarked that it seemed like the Cardinals had a much better road record than other National League teams. Turns out you were right.
And how! Cardinals road record thru Tuesday: 37-21
The next best NL team (Florida): 28-30
A difference of 9 games
By Theodore Hill, 22, Lansing, MI:Mr. Moeller, While spotting you on the bench press last week, you cracked several funny jokes about the Royals and the poor season they're having. Just how bad
is the Royals' season so far? They won only 38 of their first 101 games
, and then they dropped 18 in a row. With the loss today, Kansas City's magic number to be eliminated in the AL Central division race is 9. And it's only August 17th, Sir!
By Michael Ng, 23, Eugene, OR:Mr. Moeller, I know how much you really despise the Yankees. You told me as much the other day when I was checking your hair for ticks. So you'll get a kick out of this. After spending $65 million this year on just the Opening Day starting pitching rotation alone, the Yankees have been forced to use 26 pitchers. That's more than any other team in the Majors. At least, they can afford them all, right, Mr. Moeller?
CM, again:
You got that right, Mikey. Great work. Great work by all. I hope you readers enjoyed the efforts of the intern staff tonight. You'll be pleased to know that we've found full-time positions for three of these five fine young people, and made referrals for the others. (Look for Theodore's work on the Rosie O'Donnell blog.) Back soon.
Citizen Cindy
The United States, contrary to the opinion of some, should not allow the parents of war casualties to set foreign and military policy, in the same way that bereaved relatives of crime victims should not be allowed to dictate the punishment of the victim's perpetrator(s). The military and their relatives do not deserve extra access to the President, and it's worth noting also that Cindy Sheehan's deceased son took a voluntary oath to carry out orders on the battlefield in Iraq.
Those things being said, they also don't matter. Sheehan's around-the-clock protest outside President Bush's Texas ranch has resonated with the American public because the people recognize the depth and genuineness of Sheehan's emotions. Left-wing activist groups may have rallied quickly to her effort to gain an audience with the President, but they aren't powering the engine. Sheehan is principled to the core, and that should be obvious to any uncompromised ears that hear her statements.
This is becoming an enormous story. Sheehan has single-handedly launched an American anti-war movement. In 2004, 99 percent of Americans cast their Presidential ballots for pro-war candidates, even though everyone was aware, presumably, that the war had been launched on bogus criteria. Now-- for essentially the first time-- a savvy and impassioned dissenter is bringing the human cost of the Iraqi war to the attention of the administration, the media, and an awakening public.
Early in 2003, author and World War II veteran Kurt Vonnegut suggested, quite presciently perhaps, that President Bush is a psychopathic personality, or PP. "To say someone is a PP is to make a perfectly respectable medical diagnosis," he said, "Like saying he or she has appendicitis or athlete's foot. The classical medical text on PPs is
The Mask of Insanity by Dr. Hervey Cleckley. Read it! PPs are presentable, they know full well the suffering their actions may cause others, but they do not care. They cannot care because they are nuts. They have a screw loose."
Vonnegut believes that PPs are overrepresented in corporations and government because they are so decisive, a trait valued in those circles. Unlike normal people, they are never filled with doubts, for the simple reason that they cannot care what happens next.
Americans, as a whole, are unaccustomed to dwelling upon the human element of conflict. The conflict is always, as the George M. Cohan song said, "over there." It's interesting that in other cultures, the commonly-used phrase is "When war
comes..." In the US, war is always elsewhere. We outsource our military action.
By introducing the human element-- at long last, Sheehan has stirred up some very visceral emotions. At the vigil site in Crawford, an angry local man used his pickup to mow down hundreds of white crosses bearing the names of dead soldiers. In Cleveland today, parents of a fallen Marine joined publicly with Sheehan, calling her the "Rosa Parks of a new movement." They questioned, not the President's motives, but his ability to manage the war, asking him to send reinforcement to Iraq or withdraw altogether. Sheehan's supporters say they plan more than 1,000 anti-war vigils across the country on Wednesday.
Sheehan's actions, and their effect, have reinforced for me the things that Ralph Nader talked about in his 2004 Presidential campaign-- the importance of exercising conscience and principle above all else, and the power of one independent citizen when they're empowered to action. Individuals become movements, expectations are raised, and, eventually, solutions become realities.
The inner child
Did you rush out to see "Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo" last night? Me, neither. I didn't see the first one so I would probably be lost. I did, however, enjoy reading Roger Ebert's review earlier in the day. It's right up there with the most scathing pieces Ebert has ever written.
I was first reminded of last year's exchange between Ebert and Vincent Gallo, director of a film called "The Brown Bunny." Ebert called "The Brown Bunny" the worst film in the history of the Cannes Film Festival. Gallo responded by calling Ebert "a fat pig," and by putting a hex on the critic's colon. In print, Ebert countered, "I will one day be thin, but Vincent Gallo will always be the director of "The Brown Bunny." The entire exchange was magnified when Ebert revealed that he had been diagnosed with oral cancer.
That story had a relatively happy ending. Ebert overcame the health scare, and Gallo apologized for his comments. Meanwhile, Ebert lost about 80 pounds and Gallo re-edited his film for American release, and earned a favorable review from Ebert.
The critic's distaste for Rob Schneider's work goes back further than "The Brown Bunny." He wrote a harsh review of the first "Deuce Bigalow," and "The Animal" as well, writing once that Schneider's movies are too dumb for anyone over 13 years old. That prompted this retort from the actor: "I don't worry about fatso Roger Ebert-- his contribution to cinema is extremely limited." (A strange comment considering Ebert was the first person to win a Pulitzer Prize for film criticism, and by virtually all other accounts, has changed the way America's mass culture views his profession.) Schneider was also quoted as saying, "I know why Gene Siskel (Ebert's former TV partner) passed away so early. He had 20 years with this guy."
Here's the
link to this weekend's review. In it, Ebert comes to the defense of a fellow critic targeted by Schneider. It's brutal and hysterical.
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You many have heard already about another angry confrontation-- this one between Hall of Fame pitcher and native Iowan Bob Feller and a St. Louis sports radio host. The exchange resulted in broadcaster Mike Claiborne calling Feller "a racist." The
St. Louis Post Dispatch has the lowdown, and comments from Claiborne, and the
Des Moines Register spoke with Feller.
It was only a matter of time before something like this happened. Feller is 86 years old, and outspoken. His public comments often seem rooted in anger, resentment, and a belief that the world exists without shades of gray. But frankly, I would hate to see this become another media pile-on. We shouldn't be afraid to have this, or any other, conversation about racial stereotypes. Feller's a stubborn old mule, and the comment was truly ridiculous, but I'd like to think I could endure more than two minutes of his 86-year-old thought processes before I was throwing the word "racist" at him, considering also that Claiborne and Feller had probably never met before the interview. What good comes of that?
There's an old saying about baseball on the island of the Dominican Republic that "no one walks off the island," meaning a young player has to be a free-swinging type of hitter to get noticed and earn a shot in the big leagues. I don't know where the saying started, or to what extent the ballplayers buy into it, but it's the type of pigeon-holing assessment that gets naturally burned into people's brains when they attempt to dissect our melting-pot culture.
Roberto Clemente was the first high-profile Latino player, and he was a rather reckless-style outfielder, and a free-swinging hitter. As a result, I think, some observers came to see him as a player who lacked the fundamentals, as if the two styles were mutually-exclusive. The stereotype got stuck to all Latin players (even one as uniquely different in approach as fellow Hall-of-Famer, Panamanian Rod Carew.) Yogi Berra was the same type of ballplayer as Clemente, but was never forced to live down that reputation. Albert Pujols, a Dominican-born player, might be the most remarkably disciplined player in the game today. His constant mental adjustments and his consistency mark his greatness.
Feller, of course, is guilty of an affliction that threatens all of us-- vanity. Notice that his defense is to align himself with the minority ballplayers he played with and against, in essence, the
superior ballplayers of his generation. If anything, it's youth discrimination, that ole' universal pining for "the way things were."
Here's a guy who's damaged more than a few personal relationships over time, and now sits firmly in the twilight of his life-- and he believes, perhaps, his legacy. He's been in the national limelight since the time he was a teenager, treated as someone truly special. How will I be remembered? he asks. Will I be remembered at all? And, of course, the current media hysteria surrounding steroids in baseball has given the older generations free license to scold young players. It's ironic that he got in trouble while answering the question-- what's wrong and what's right about the game today?
I feel more pity than anger about Feller's comments, but not just towards Feller, but for the whole lot of us. We build our own cocoons, and if we're not equipped to accept the perspectives of others on the same plane as our own, time becomes a steamroller.
I can see clearly now...
Iowa's Attorney General Tom Miller filed consumer fraud charges Wednesday against a Fairfield, IA outfit called Vision Improvement Technologies. The company markets something called "The See Clearly Method," a program of video tapes and eye exercises they say will naturally improve your vision. They send you a series of videos and workbook assignments that help you to focus your eyes better, the idea being that the muscles in the eye are just like any other muscle in the body that needs to be continually conditioned to be improved.
I know this much about the company because I participated in the program myself. Two summers ago, I had grown sick of wearing my glasses after about six months. My vision had only deteriorated in life to the point that I needed help driving, and enjoying TV, theater and sporting events. My computer screen at work was well within my range of focus, and my daily life was only slightly harrassed by poor vision. I was a prime candidate for modest, but meaningful improvement, I thought.
The program had a 30-day, money-back trial offer so I gave it that much time. After a month, my vision had-- I repeat,
had improved. I estimate that on the eye charts I had improved my focus by four to six inches. The problem was-- four to six inches is meaningless on the highway; I was giving up 30 to 45 minutes of each day doing the exercises; and I was about to be billed $350 for a package of tapes, booklets, and charts that seemed to me to be worth about 40 bucks. So I photocopied the eye charts at work, and then sent the package back. In all, I invested about $10 for shipping expenses both ways.
At the press conference in Des Moines yesterday, Miller said the state had received dozens of complaints about the company from people who had attempted to get refunds on the program. When I heard this, my first reaction was-- these consumers were lazy. And I'm not surprised. I consider myself a pretty disciplined and patient person, and I struggled to keep exercising. What chance do these other poor saps have?
I am convinced that the system, while overpriced, can be successful. Their fundamental argument is indisputable-- wearing glasses will not improve your vision. They are a crutch that will only cause your eyes to deteriorate more in adjustment. You know this if you are a regular wearer of glasses-- the more you wear them, the more dependent upon them you become.
Miller confessed that he found five customers who believed the techniques worked. Five out of how many, who knows? He dismissed their testimonies by saying, "There can be a placebo effect in any kind of situation." Of course, what's he going to say otherwise?
Don't doubt for a second the powerful political influence of the medical lobby. The AMA drones secure their little nest eggs with drugs and surgical procedures, while chasing patients away from natural cures like acupuncture. They simultaneously acknowledge, though, that the human body is, by and large, a remarkably efficient, self-righting machine.
And then there was Tom Miller, standing before the capitol's press corps, defending the ophthalmology industry--- his "crutches" wrapped around his ears, with lenses so distorted that they would probably afford healthy eyes a view of Saturn's rings. It was like listening to the town drunk tell you how to stop boozing.
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I live in a kind of hippie neighborhood. (Sherman Hill, Des Moines, USA,
Mad props to the Dirrty Central!) It was starting to rain as I drove home from work tonight. A couple blocks away from my apartment, there were some middle-age women out in the yard doing some sort of interpretive dance. I thought to myself, those chicks need to get out of the rain. But then I thought,
what if they're causing the rain?
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I'm optimistic about a new show on the UPN fall schedule called, "Everybody Hates Chris." The title, of course, is a play on "Everybody Loves Raymond." It's from executive producer Chris Rock, and we're to believe it's basically about the comedian's life growing up as the only black kid in an otherwise all-white school. Very intriguing. The problem, as I see it though, could be in the quality of life for people like me. People named Chris. Are people going to be taunting me with this title all the time? That's the last thing I need is another potential avenue for people to taunt me.
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President Bush got his energy bill passed this week. The oil lobby loves it. Half the Democrats caved on it. No surprises. The bill did succeed in extending Daylight Savings Time by another month. Into November, I think. It doesn't matter to me when we change the clocks. I always waste that extra hour anyway. Last year was the worst offense to date. I used it to cook twenty "3 Minute Eggs." Dumb.
Declaring war on the "War on Drugs"
Hats off to the New York Times' "resident conservative," John Tierney, for his well-reasoned, Libertarian critique this morning of the nation's failing "War on Drugs."
This column should be evidence that the solutions to this problem will ultimately run deeper than the traditional thinking of our two major political parties, which have both stopped problem-solving, and simply adopted knee-jerk, "tough on crime" campaign rhetoric to scare voters on election day, while doing nothing to fix the problem.
The logical extension of Tierney's thought is the legalization of all illicit drugs, which would bring about results similar to the lifting of Prohibition. At last we could seek solutions to drug abuse in the public health arena, rather than in the law enforcement arena, which has failed us miserably and expensively.
BUT:
Don't give the drugs to corporate America and their marketing pimps. The government, through the National Institute of Health, should control and regulate the product. Otherwise, we'll see Pfizer commercials along these lines, "Hi, I'm Rush Limbaugh for OxyContin... Do the rigors of life often overwhelm your "rugged individualism?" Ask your doctor if "Hillbilly Heroin" is right for you."
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Howard Stern announced last week that his cable TV show-- previously on E!-- will be moving in January to the pay cable In Demand Networks. E! said it could no longer carry the show due to fear of regulation-- read: censorship.
I'm a Howard Stern fan (though that TV show is dreadfully boring.) I think ultimately he's the First Amendment hero he proclaimed to be in his 1997 biographical film "Private Parts." His broadcasting legacy will be in tact, regardless of anything he does at this point in his career. However, his "escape" this year from the public airwaves and commercial television strikes me more as persecution from his political enemies than the calculating business decision on his part he's attempting to project. The best programming on television (HBO) already costs me $70 a month, while inoffensive and bland programs rule the public spectrum.
You now have to pay for free speech in America.
Moeller TV Listings 8/9/05
Hope it's not to late to catch you. The incomparable Bill Maher guests on Letterman tonight.
The least American pastime-- and the most
In his Pro Football Hall of Fame induction speech Sunday, former 49ers quarterback Steve Young told us the greatest moment of his career was in the moments after San Francisco's 1994 Championship when all 55 players on the team gathered for the Lord's Prayer in the locker room.
All 55, huh? (The national news media, in their summaries of Young's speech, ignored this line completely.)
The Christian world would have us believe that there are "no Atheists in foxholes"-- though I remember hearing John McCain say once that he never called upon his God for aid in the Hanoi Hilton. (The soldiers were engaged in one of Caesar's tasks, he said, not God's.)
It seems it's also true that there are no Atheists in a football locker room. Or Agnostics. Or Jews or Muslims. Or Scientologists. But can this be true? New Saints receiver (and former Ram) Az Hakim is Muslim. What does he do when his teammates are kneeling on the field in a very public and Christian prayer after each game? I.
Why don't we hear from these non-Christian football players? Is it possible they don't feel it's safe to speak publicly about their minority faith or lack of one, and expect to keep a good standing with their teammates? Young, a devout Morman, has every right to express his beliefs, just as I have the right to believe that public proselytizing cheapens a person's faith. (And it puts a damper on a championship party-- Kurt Warner, are you listening?) But the laws of the workplace also should apply to professional sports locker rooms, and the locker rooms of public educational institutions. As far as I'm concerned, excluding teammates from any team activity based on their religion, or lack of one, is right on par with the racial intolerance and intimidation of previous generations. It may just take a special person to bring the issue to the forefront-- an Atheist Jackie Robinson in shoulder pads
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Did you get a chance to listen to the Tom Vilsack I-Cubs' broadcast tonight on KXNO? I tuned in starting with the 3rd inning, and had already missed the Governor's call on two Corey Patterson home runs. (The former Cub centerfielder-- and future Pittsburgh Pirate-- also added an RBI single.) In the 6th inning, Vilsack announced that a Cubs' home run "dusted off the Capitol Dome." Pretty good.
Actually, Vilsack was very good. He had a lot of people to chat with, and he paced well between pitches with comments such as "outfield, straight away and deep," and "good crowd on hand tonight."
In the 4th inning, Walford, IA native and 1995 Benton Community graduate, Nate Frese, came to bat with two out for the Cubs. Vilsack pointed out that Nate's son, Maddux, was celebrating his first birthday today, and opined about how great it would be if Nate could give him a birthday present. Frese lined a two-run single to center, his second hit of the night. "Happy Birthday, Maddux," Vilsack hollered, "Dad's bringing home two runs." Then he wondered aloud why a shortstop would name his son after a pitcher.
Vilsack said earlier on Monday that his broadcasting hero, while growing up in Pennsylvania, was the Pirates' Bob Prince. He planned to incorporate Prince's trademark home-run call, "Kiss it good-bye" into his broadcast. He may have.
I Googled Prince during the game, and found out that he would end each broadcast by saying, "Good night, Mary Edgerly, wherever you are." No one ever discovered who Mary Edgerly was. I stuck with Vilsack through the end of the broadcast, wondering if he would say that. But he didn't. That would have been cool.
Come to think of it, maybe he didn't say it because he knows where she is.
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You may be wondering whether I have better things to do than listen to the Governor call almost an entire minor-league baseball game on the radio.
Well, I don't.
Talking baseball
"The Baseball Show on KXNO" airs for a full two hours tonight, beginning at 5pm. If you're so inclined, you can use the same on-line link to the right Monday night to hear Iowa Governor Tom Vilsack do the play-by-play of the Iowa Cubs game.
The game begins at 7:05pm.
3000 hits, you must acquit
First of all, the title of this post doesn't apply. I just wanted to copyright it.
Nevertheless, here is some "nuts and bolts" steroid information that isn't getting much play in the media:
Approximately 1,000 steroid tests have been administered to baseball players by MLB this year. Of those, 100 are still being processed, leaving 900 results. Of the 900 results, eight have been positive. That means that fewer than one percent-- 0.89 of one percent-- tested positive. (Source: Murray Chass, NY Times)
Two years ago, the number was 5 to 7 percent. A high profile player (Hall of Famer?) has been caught using #24 on the list of anabolic androgenic steroids, covered by Schedule III of the Code of Federal Regulations, appearing on page 160 of baseball's collective bargaining agreement. It seems strange to me that so many in the media and Congress still think the system doesn't work. They babble on a lot to the contrary, but the last thing they want is for this story to go away.
Palmeiro may have enjoyed two months of lag before his results were made public, but this was because he was allowed to challenge the result before a four-man health advisory committee. If a committee member sees reasonable cause for challenge, the case goes to arbitration. Six of the other seven suspended players challenged the penalty, but did not get past the committee.
The whole process seems pretty effective to me-- and Constitutional to boot.
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A bumper sticker seen in Des Moines Wednesday-- An American Flag and the words, "These colors don't run--- the world."
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I'm a weak man, but I can't miss Jessica Simpson on Letterman Thursday night. Her "Dukes of Hazzard" clips have me drooling. I want to say something serious about her, though. If she's dumb, she's dumb like a fox-- a very wealthy fox. And we could all take a lesson in public relations from her Iraqi comments. She came back from the war and criticized her show's producers for their whitewashing of the dangers they faced. She did it eloquently and in deference to those who serve. She could have been another Southern-bred lighting rod to conservatives like Natalie Maines or Ted Turner, but she deftly avoided being "Dixie Chick-ed." That would seem to require a pretty bright person.
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The Beatles returned to Busch Stadium Tuesday night. Kind of. A few hundred fans showed up early for the Cards/Marlins game and watched The Liverpool Legends, a Beatles tribute band managed by George Harrison's sister. The real Beatles played at Busch before 23,000 fans on the rainy evening of August 21st, 1966, only three months after the ballpark had opened. Last night, fans were only swooning for Cardinals' stars Chris Carpenter and Albert Pujols, but news reports from the show 39 years ago indicate that several young women that night were treated for "mild hysteria." Symptoms included "weeping, wailing, and uncontrollable shaking."
For those who care, here's the Beatles set list from their August '66 Tour:
Rock and Roll Woman
She's a Woman
If I Needed Someone
Baby's in Black
Day Tripper
I Feel Fine
Yesterday
I Wanna Be Your Man
Nowhere Man (a sample of which the Liverpool Lads shared with the Cardinals' broadcast team on Monday)
Paperback Writer
I'm Down *(For some shows, the band substituted "Long Tall Sally.")
Faith and evidence
Can a Roman Catholic strictly adherent to the policies of the Vatican be trusted to safely uphold Constitutional principles on the Supreme Court? In the case of court nominee John Roberts, commentator Christopher Hitchens can't be sure. Roberts reportedly told Sen. Richard Durbin in a private meeting that he might recuse himself from a court case in which church doctrine was at odds.
Why should this question be asked only of Catholic nominees? Says Hitchens, "Well, that's easy. The Roman Catholic Church claims the right to legislate on morals for all its members and excommunicate them if they don't conform. The church is also a foreign state, which has diplomatic relations with Washington... The newly installed Pope Benedict XVI has ruled that Catholic politicians who endorse the right to abortion should be denied sacraments."
Under our system, of course, the government derives its power, not from an omnipotent, but from the consent of the governed. Even Ret. Judge Robert Bork, a lunatic constructionist, admitted as much this morning on C-Span. Roberts better tighten up his answer to the question of his working faith before his hearing.
Here's the Hitchens
link.
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Everyone's talking about the timing of Rafael Palmeiro's steroid suspension. Did he really test positive during Spring Training within days of testifying before Congress? How long have Major League Baseball, Palmeiro, and the Baltimore Orioles known about the test results? Did they delay the public disclosure until after Raffy had rapped career hit #3000? (Now we know why the Orioles were so desperate to trade for Phil Nevin and Mike Lowell.) But I also want to take time to shout-out to Barry Bonds. Under the radar Monday, Bonds publicly packed it in for the year. What exquisite timing. Remember how Bonds couldn't testify in March because he was rehabbing? That rehab program's going to wind up being over a year long.
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I've changed my mind since yesterday. If President Bush believes Palmeiro's story, then I don't.
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Italian authorities have broken up a global steroid ring that supplied the performance-enhancing drugs to U.S. soldiers serving in Iraq. I predict that this steroid scandal will go unmentioned in President Bush's next State of the Union address.
Peer evaluations
It turns out Ryne Sandberg had plenty to say all those years. The soft-spoken former Cub, inducted into the Hall of Fame on Sunday, used part of his induction speech to criticize the players of today who "swing for the fence every time" and mug for the cameras. Many in the Chicago media believe Sandberg was taking a veiled shot at former teammate Sammy Sosa when he spoke the following lines-- "A lot of people say this honor validates my career. But I didn't work hard for validation... I played (the game) right because that's what you're supposed to do-- play it right and with respect. If this validates anything, it's that turning two is more important than finding the little red light in the dugout camera."
Ouch. Sometimes the battle to be the "Mr. Cub" of a given generation resembles the backstage of a Miss America pageant.
In truth, I'm torn over the content of Sandberg's speech, though I want to point out that I think it's always a plus when someone uses an award speech to say anything meaningful at all. Sandberg's right, in particular, about the focus on the long ball. I've long argued that a large reason for the influx of home runs is simply that everybody's swinging for them. A generation or two ago, a team might have only 2 to 4 players in their line-up that took upper-cut swings. Now each team has 6 or 7, including the middle-infielders, who, like Sandberg, used to be the exception. (This is why strikeouts have gone through the roof as well.) My first thought when I read the excerpts of Sandberg's speech was that Ryno had been reading Whitey Herzog's book. Of course, that's a great compliment.
My other thought, though, was that Sandberg's criticisms were making him worthy of one of the world's most exclusive and discriminate fraternities, and that's not a compliment. Every year, it seems, we get more and more Hall of Fame members lecturing us on the proper credentials for induction. We have guys like Bob Feller harboring public resentment towards the larger contracts given to younger players. "Rapid Robert" and others have been outspoken opponents of Pete Rose's enshrinement. Frank Robinson told us earlier this year that he believes any player found to have used steroids should have his numbers erased from the record books. And every two years, the group votes as a whole to deny Hall entry to each and every candidate on their Veterans' Committee ballot.
Their comments too often seem self-serving, and, in the case of Sandberg and a lot of new inductees, a way of ingratiating themselves to their new fraternity brothers. Sandberg told the press Sunday that he idolized players like Mike Schmidt and Pete Rose when he came up in the Phillies' organization. And who wouldn't. Or shouldn't. But Sandberg touched a nerve with me when he juxtaposed that with a speech that included a direct reference to steroids in the modern era, "In my day," Sandberg said, "if a guy showed up 20 pounds heavy, he was out of shape and in trouble."
This takes me back to the Robinson comment. There's little doubt these Hall-of-Fame sluggers hated to see their old records topple during the last decade. Robinson was passed by another player (Sosa) on the all-time home run list just last week, and Sandberg lost his record for career home runs by a secondbaseman in recent years to Jeff Kent. It's fair to say, of course, that today's players have clinical advantages that players of previous generations didn't have, but what else is new? Isn't the technology that allows a doctor to take a tendon out of a leg and put it in a shoulder (Tommy John surgery) also an unfair advantage? Steroid users were operating within the rules of the day-- and I might add, they were often more hard-working and committed to health than their forebears.
The deeper you dig into all of this, the murkier it gets. The less hypocritical Hall of Famers, like Bob Gibson, have admitted that their competitive natures probably would have led them to steroids during their careers had the resources been available-- and not explicitly forbidden. We know that, as a group, players in the 1960s popped amphetamines like candy, and Tom House, a retired pitcher, has told us that steroids were readily available in the clubhouse as far back as the early '70s, when he played with an Atlanta Braves team that included the all-time home run king, Hank Aaron.
I would never peg Ryne Sandberg as a steroid user, but then, based solely on physique, I would have never pegged Rafael Palmeiro, either. A former teammate of Sandberg's suspended for steroids on Monday, Palmeiro may very well be one of the modern players Sandberg was referring to in his speech. Still, it would be difficult to separate any two players by generation when theirs overlap by more than a decade.
I'm not trying to sully Sandberg's well-deserved induction, though it may appear that I am since I just slandered him into the steroid scandal, but my point is the danger of proclaiming your own achievement by making a villain of others. I happen to agree with everything Sandberg said. And there's no doubt he played the game the right way during his career. I just think I liked him a little more when I thought he didn't have to tell us.
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Now, as for Palmeiro. It would be very easy to come down on this guy, if not for being a cheater, than at least, for being a hypocrite, since the guy was lying to Congress as his colleague, Mark McGwire, took a public flogging for his silence. But I'm not going to do that, and the reason is this-- I believe Palmeiro's story. There is no way this guy would have been knowingly taking steroids, especially during the month he was to testify before Congress. (Though I guess that doesn't mean he never used them.) This just shows how murky the water has become. The line between "steroids" and "steroid-like substances" shifts constantly, and it seems more than likely, at least to me, that Palmeiro thought he was toeing the right side of the line, which he's almost obligated to do when you consider the capitalist natures of both the American and National professional baseball leagues. I've said on the radio that the biggest problem facing baseball in this regard is that they have no system in place to tell baseball players what they
can do. It's time to acknowledge these players' competitive natures, and establish a uniform outline.
Sanctimonious sportswriters will line up and take their shots when these modern players are considered for Hall of Fame induction, but the writers will be doing the wrong thing if they elect to scapegoat the best players of the era for the sins of the league itself, which allowed the home runs to fly while the turnstiles spun. Other groups, besides the ballplayers, benefited from the baseball resurgence of the late 1990s, including the writers themselves, who flocked to the publishing houses in record numbers. Let's make sure the focus of reform stays on the future, rather than the past. (Hey, didn't Mark McGwire try to tell us that?) Baseball would be well rid of steroids, but it would be better rid of its hypocrites.
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10:30pm update: This is just too juicy-- although ludicrous. Jose Canseco tells Sporting News radio that he suspects Major League Baseball and/or the players' union may have spiked Palmeiro's urine sample.
