Chris' Movie Club-- Yo Soy Boricua
A recommendation tonight comes in the category of "untold people's histories." Actress Rosie Perez made her directorial debut in 2005 with a documentary feature for the Independent Film Channel entitled "Yo Soy Boricua, Pa'Que Tu Lo Sepas," which provided an intriguing look at the history of U.S.-Puerto Rican relations and the Puerto Rican people. The title translated is--
I'm Puerto Rican, just so you know, and it's available wherever DVDs are rented and sold.
Friends in the past have been told of my contention that there is no film or television program in existence that cannot or could not have been made better by the addition of Rosie Perez, who is a dazzling and reflective light on the lens to surely match the national wonder of bioluminescence at La Parguera beach near Lajas, Puerto Rico, and when Rosie turns the camera on her friends and family and the Puerto Rican people living on the island and in New York City, she finds a new depth onto herself, as well as to her native fellows.
Puerto Ricans living in the ratified 50 are not immigrants but rather citizens of the United States by nature of their birth upon the passing of the Jones Act of Congress in 1917. Puerto Rico is considered a commonwealth of the United States and its citizens are statutory U.S. citizens, but island residents have no representation in Congress, only a Commissioner, or non-voting delegate, and they have no electors within the Electoral College structure. They pay federal taxes to the United States and are subject to the compulsory draft of the U.S. military, for which they've served in each U.S. conflict since the turn of the 20th century, but their lack of a political voice in the government of the United States is part of the reason that roughly half of the island's residents still live today in poverty.
Though Perez's film is primarily focused on the late 20th century history of the commonwealth, Puerto Rico's history also represents, after the annihilation of the various tribes of the American Indian, one of the earliest case studies of America's imperialistic and colonial-minded foreign policy that continues unimpeded more than a century later. (My words, not Rosie's.) In 1898, eight days after the establishment of Puerto Rico's first autonomous government, the Spanish province was invaded by the United States under the orders of President William McKinley, and the island quickly became what it has been ever since-- a land mass with an area of 5,324 square miles occupied largely by the United States Navy. Shipping laws imposed and upheld in the years subsequent have wreaked economic havoc as well, severely limiting free trade to and from the island.
Puerto Rico has served over time as a testing ground for U.S. militarists and capitalists for everything from the launching of missiles to the studied use of birth control pills and other drugs by U.S. pharmaceutical companies located on the island. Much of this is documented in Perez's film, but it's the human warmth of her and her friends and family that give the documentary such great resonance. Puerto Rico is undoubtedly a beautiful and effervescent country in its topography, its culture, and its people, and it's very lucky indeed to have a daughter like Rosie Perez as spokesperson.
It's Not High Finance, It's Called Heart and Soul - by Aaron Moeller
The A-Train 2007 Concert Series made its final stop last week at the Northrop Auditorium on the University of Minnesota campus in Minneapolis. Irish bard Van Morrison will have made only six appearances in the States this year and he saved them all for the holiday season, possibly as a deliberate (and thoughtful) Christmas gift to me. The Northrop is a lustrous old building built in 1929 (back when buildings had character) and has impeccable sound. Incredibly intimate - our seats in the lower balcony were ideal. I've been there one time previously - for Bruce Springsteen's
Ghost of Tom Joad solo acoustic tour in 1996.
Van Morrison made his name initially, of course, from his brief run as a founding godfather of garage-rock. (Birthing the songs "Gloria" and "Here Comes the Night" alone would cement anyone's rock and roll reputation, even if "Brown-Eyed Girl"
wasn't one of the most popular songs on the planet.) But at the dawn of the 1970s, Morrison gave the world the twin masterpieces
Astral Weeks and
Moondance and the artist was essentially delivered into a different realm, one in which names like William Blake and W.B. Yeats intermingle freely with names like John Lee Hooker, Robert Johnson, Hank Williams and Bob Dylan. He's been playing with mystical variations of jazz and rhythm and blues ever since, with plenty of excursions into his Irish folk roots, too, for good measure. This hybrid sound - and all the dream-like beauty contained within - is the Van Morrison Sound.
Morrison's reclusive nature and prickly reputation, as well as his nearly pathological disgust with the trappings of "show business" (nearly every album contains at least one song seemingly directed toward the record industry figures and "big time operators" that are intent on ruining him) has fed the image of an inconsistent live performer who often gives the impression he'd rather be anywhere else. And nary a print interview has ever been granted.
With no opening act, Morrison and his ten-piece band took the stage at the exact 7:30 start time listed on our tickets. The lines "Don't want to discuss it, think it's time for a change" seem a fitting way to start any of his shows, and it's those lines that delivered the radio classic "Domino" to the full house of 4800-plus. Van, you could tell, had a cold, and I wondered if the night would find him in good spirits. His vocal range, such as his occasional falsetto, is long gone, and the voice is gruffer, but it's still an ideal vehicle for his earthy, mystical, Celtic-flavored blues. On the opening tune, he also took the first of numerous solos on his saxophone.
"Magic Time" is the title cut from his second-most recent album, an underrated little gem of a song collection that also happens to be about the tenth Morrison album in succession to be dubbed "a return to form" by the mainstream music press. "Tear Your Playhouse Down" is where Van the Man seemed to overcome his cold and it was clear we were in for a night of energized music, a fantabulous night to make romance. The tune is from
Pay the Devil, Morrison's newest album and first consisting entirely of straight-ahead country tunes. It was this album sound that dominated the proceedings. This most recent Morrison touring band lacks the R&B-flavored horns of his mid-70s Caledonia Soul Orchestra (in fact, Van's own sax was the night's only horn) nor did it contain the traditional Irish instrumentation that the man is equally known for. The sound is heavy on pedal steel guitar, fiddle, banjo and the other glorious trappings of traditional country music.
Despite the recent foray into country music, the jazz-influenced vocalizing remains. He's always scatting and dropping occasional, random lyrics from his own back catalog of songs. "Talking all out of my mind", he once called it in song. As with many of the tunes from the set list, the "Magic Time" solos in particular called to mind recognizable melodies from the jazz standards that Morrison has clearly been in love with his entire life. Jazz
is improvisation, and becomes, by definition, Music of the Moment, but when it's at its best,
nothing is an accident. Nothing is incidental.
"Stranded" is the lead song from
Magic Time, and found Morrison lamenting that everyday is "hustle time" and one always has "one more mountain to climb". Everything is a journey to Mr. Morrison, and everything has an element of yearning and searching for the healing spirit. "Have I Told You Lately" brought a roar of recognition from the Great North faithful. A monster hit when covered by Rod Stewart, the tune first appeared on Van's peerless album of spiritual bliss,
Avalon Sunset. Do you own this album? Seek it out if you want to feel as human you ever have in your life. I'll lend you my copy.
This was not a show of highlights, but a seamless, almost hypnotic show of one great groove bleeding into the next. Beyond the songs' lyrics, Van had no verbal exchanges with the crowd. A straight jazz reading of "Moondance" with nearly every band member taking a solo thrilled the crowd, but Van backed off many of the vocals and let his background singers take over the song with their mannered sound. He even wandered off the stage for the first of three times on the night and didn't return until the band introductions had been completed in his absence. Morrison, of course, is often his own band. Whether taking a turn on the harmonica, strumming an acoustic guitar, saddling up to his organist three or four times a night to play an adjacent electric piano, or taking a sax solo (as he did on at least half the songs), to the end, Van is the consummate musician's musician.
"Bright Side of the Road" and "Jackie Wilson Said" received rave reviews from the assembled masses, likely from their inclusion on Best-of compilations, but Van seemed to save his most impassioned vocals for his most recent (and more obscure) songs. The man could have retired in the mid-1970s and still been rock and roll royalty for a lifetime, alongside only a handful of peers. But far from being one to rest on his laurels, or a decades old songbook of nostalgia, the last seven songs performed at this show contained none older than 1991.
When I was fresh out of college and returned home (jobless) to the Moeller family homestead, I used to stay up late, flexing my writing muscles, and despite taking some fiction and memoir writing courses in school, I still felt as though I was taking my first stabs at creative writing. But sometimes - once in a great while - I'd put down something that felt right, that felt like I'd created some
thing. These were mostly poems that (more than anything else) represented my life as a frustrated songwriter trapped in a body void of musical talent, as well as some short stories that may still exist today in one form or another. (Email me for copies!) After writing these pieces, I would dive into a six-pack and start proofreading - occasionally both cringing
and being reluctantly satisfied by the results. I would relentlessly edit and rewrite all my literary children for posterity. As I did this, my bedroom soundtrack was always
Days Like This and
Hymns to the Silence, Van Morrison's finest 90's albums. It was with great satisfaction and a renewed faith in kismet that on December 20th, 2007, on a night when I should happen to be in attendance, the Belfast Cowboy would play "In the Afternoon" from
Days Like This, which morphed into a medley including two of my other obscure favorites from that album, "Raincheck" ("Call me Raincheck, in the afternoon/ My name is Raincheck, need a shot of rhythm and blues") and the ethereal, forever-effervescent "Ancient Highway".
"Precious Time", like "In the Midnight", is from 1999's
Back on Top. I've never lucked into a copy of this album, so though I didn't know these songs, most in attendance seemed to. "Precious Time", in particular, brought the night's warmest response.
"Have......have to get back, have to get back to basics" is the familiar opening line of "I'm Not Feeling It Anymore" - that bastard
Hymns to the Silence ode to creative frustration. "I can feel it in my throat, that's all she wrote" keeps things underscored with that forceful, rollicking piano-and-bass riff, even more immediate than in it's dynamite album incarnation. The song miraculously managed to find even more momentum: "When I was high at the party, everything looked good." Yup - pretty sure I been there, too. Then a minor rewrite: "Like the great Paul McCartney said, 'Money, it can't buy you love'." Everyone is sitting up in their chairs, moving, bouncing in their seats. The well-dressed crowd can't sit still. "You have to look for happiness within yourself/ And don't go chasin', thinkin' that it's somewhere else", reminds the lyric, and then, with a groove that helps transcend any simple platitudes or cliches: "All you need is the truth and the truth will set you free".
Amen. And transcendence again. Talking all out of my mind...
Indian Summer. In the woods. Deep in the trees. Half a mile from the county fair, and the rain keep pourin' down. If I don't see you through the week, see you through the window. Whether in Ireland. On Cyprus Avenue. On Hyndford Street. In Banbridge Town in the County Down. Whether gazing out on St. Dominic's Preview. Or singing the Gloriana tune. The lips that you kiss will say Christmas and switch on your electric light. Whether I'm in the States. In Louisiana, talkin' to Huddie Ludbetter. Or when I'm down in Bourbon Street, singing "Jack of Diamonds". If you don't see me when I'm on my lucky streak, then I'll see you in the Celtic New Year.
High-ho silver, tit for tat, I love you for that.
Happy New Year, everyone.
Boxing Day
Happy Boxing Day. Or should I say Happy Ozzie Smith's Birthday. I hope Santa overlooked all of that terrible stuff you did.
---
What makes Joe Biden so especially worthy of "being taken seriously," as
the New York Times suggests today?
The Senator from Mastercard hasn't "weathered" the storms that Dennis Kucinich has in
his political career. Biden's reputed "obvious expertise in foreign policy" includes having voted to surrender his legislative oversight on the Iraq war, and the promotion of a "post-war" policy in the region that would partition the state and require a forced migration for millions of Iraqis.
---
Merry Christmas from your Democratic Congress.
---
Let me get this straight-- the Cardinals had $4 million last year to throw into a one-year contract for a reconstructed Kip Wells, but a reconstructed Mark Prior, with a career ERA of 3.51, can be had by the Padres this winter for $1 million plus incentives?
---
Don't you hate it when criminals
attempt to profit off their crimes?
The worldwide leader
From the e-mail inbox:
CMAnother rant for your archives:If you don't get those "pay-per-view" channels and you still want to see some adult action, you can see ESPN blow the Patriots every hour of every day.It's damn ridiculous. Last year when the Colts were in the same situation the coverage was bad but not unbearable. Sure the feat they might
accomplish is newsworthy; however, there is a difference between news and propoganda.Want more proof? Jessica Simpson on Sportscenter?!! WTF! Since when did who a player dates be of any sports significance? Honestly, when I saw the story I thought I was watching Entertainment Tonight.Give me a break ESPN. As you cover sports, it's sad that you have no competition of your own.KemESPN is in desperate need of some industry competition. I haven't seen a mismatch this bad since the 2007 battle between the United States government's executive and legislative branches.
---
I received a personal request this week also to re-link to last year's list of the
"5 greatest Christmas music recordings of all-time", and the subsequent
correction published by my brother.
I want no one to be able to say that I contributed to the War on Christmas.
---
You've got to be kidding me with this talk of more Congressional hearings on steroids in baseball. Have these clowns ever heard the names Bill Romanowski or Rodney Harrison? Guess not. Let's finally admit then-- at least-- that not all sports are created equal.
---
If a majority of Americans truly believe that a steroids pandemic has permanently inflicted and crippled the game, how can any solution to the problem not include the resignation of Bud Selig, the league's commissioner for the last 16 years?
"I am a Green"
Cynthia McKinney has officially announced her candidacy for President as a representative of the Green Party. Watch
this important message.
---
Like battered wives, Democratic voters refuse to walk away from an abusive relationship. According to a new
USA Today poll, now-half of party voters say they favor a candidate with the best chance of beating the Republican over a nominee who agrees with them on almost all issues. Only one month ago, polled Democrats favored the ideological match by a margin of 3 to 2, the same divide that still describes voters in the Republican party.
---
Al Gore's running mate in 2000
today announced his endorsement of John McCain for president.
Moeller TV Listings 12/18/07
The Ralph Nader documentary, "An Unreasonable Man," promoted so heavily on this blog, airs tonight at 8pm central on PBS.
Diamond Jim
Goodbye to the baseball
prince of St. Louis, Jim Edmonds, traded to the San Diego Padres on Friday night. The longest-tenured Cardinal, James always had a flair for the dramatic. His game-winning home run in Game 6 of the 2004 NLCS (one of 13 career postseason home runs), and his diving catch in Game 7 helped to deliver the city's first pennant in 17 years, but it was night in and night out during the season that he could be most appreciated, providing highlight reel defensive plays on a pace almost to match the Wizard of Oz. I loved watching the 3-time All-Star and 6-time Gold Glover air out his throws to the plate from center, and he always played a shallow field defying a slugger to chase him back to the wall (or over it) or to cheat a man at the plate.
At bat, he provided the left-handed protection in the lineup first for Mark McGwire, then for Albert Pujols, slugging above the .55o plateau five times. During Edmonds' eight seasons with the club, the Cards posted a combined regular-season record of 736-559, reaching the postseason six times, the World Series twice, and winning it all in 2006. I saw him play in person 52 times, saw him lace 52 hits and drive 16 home runs.
What say you,
Bernie Miklasz?:
We're going to miss the ballet in center field, the Jimnastics, the swan dives for the baseball. We'll miss the way he'd jump to his feet to proudly display the grass stains and the dirt that were smeared across his uniform.We'll miss the theater, and his actor's sense of timing as he tracked that elusive fly ball. The way he envisioned and marked the landing spot ahead of time, knowing just how far he had to go, and arriving just in time to deliver that extra suspense, that extra drama. All of the web gems, the web Jims, he created.And after crashing to the turf, or into a wall, he'd milk the moment by immediately sinking to his knees, roll over and writhe in pain, going down as if he had just been smacked on the forehead by a wrecking ball. Miraculously, he would rise, and slowly trot back to the Cardinals' dugout, taking a little extra time to let the applause wash over him and heal his bruises, his psyche.
And then there was the swing: so fluid and sweet and so smooth that it did not disturb the summer breeze.And so the centerfielder leaves for Southern California, where he'll play through the final aches and pains of his career in the warm sun near his birthplace of Fullerton in Orange County. It's not easy for one man to tell another that he loves him, but I love you, Jim Edmonds, and I'm going to miss you terribly.
The roar that moused
One Christmas when I was a kid, my parents received as a gag gift a roll of toilet paper decorated with the words "Merry Christmas." I thought about that gift again on Thursday after George Mitchell released his long-awaited report on steroids in baseball.
Here are some other random thoughts on the topic...
-- The most popular phrase or headline used by the media on Friday to encapsulate the results of Mitchell's "independent" report was "collective failure," but Mitchell references 86
players by name in his report, and after skimming through all 311 pages online, I came across the name of only one club owner, Giants' managing partner Peter Magowan, who was mentioned in passing in reference to the BALCO investigation. Mitchell was quoted on Thursday as saying that "everyone involved in baseball over the past two decades-- commissioners, club officials, the players association and players-- shares responsibility for the steroids era," but "club officials" must refer only to middle managers like GMs and field bosses.
-- The choice to publicly slime the players individually was nothing more than payback for the union's refusal to cooperate with this so-called "independent" investigation-- an investigation ordered by Bud Selig, an employee of the club owners, and conducted by Mitchell, a director and consultant for the Boston Red Sox.
-- With only a handful of exceptions, the list of players in Mitchell's report could be very accurately retitled, or subtitled, "A Who's Who of Baseball's 60 Day Disabled List 1995-Present"
-- In the appendix of the report, Mitchell discloses that he's a consultant for the ownership group of the Red Sox, headed principally by John Henry and Tom Werner, but he uses the term "director" with quote marks surrounding it. On no official Red Sox team literature that I've ever encountered, from media guides to the club's website, do the quote marks appear. No major Red Sox players were named in the report. Nearly one-third of the 2000 World Championship New York Yankees roster was implicated.
-- In the body of the report, during which Mitchell suggests some solutions for the so-called steroids problem, the former Senator references his personal role in brokering a peace accord some years ago in Northern Ireland. This should rightfully add fuel to the accusations that this report is a careerist move on Mitchell's part, who's long been rumored to be a candidate for the U.S. Supreme Court and even to be the next commissioner. This personal ambition is nothing new in baseball circles. The league's so-called "independent" investigator in the Pete Rose matter in 1989, John Dowd, has subsequently done everything in his power to keep his name in the headlines also, and to lead a one-man crusade in opposition to Rose's league reinstatement-- to such a degree, actually, that Major League Baseball was forced to file a complaint against Dowd in 1999 with the District of Columbia bar association to keep him from continuing to speak publicly on the matter.
-- The National Baseball Hall of Fame, RIP, 1939-1986. It was fun while it lasted. There won't be much of a museum left though 50 years from now when Kirby Puckett is still the Hall's youngest member. They'll all be players from the pre-Canseco era. By 2057, they'll probably be resorting to the inductions of Cookie Lavagetto and Cookie Rojas. That would be cool if they went in together.
-- Of course the previous scenario will never play out, which was the real, unreported story from Thursday's press conference in relationship to Hall of Fame balloting. Roger Clemens
has to be allowed in the Hall on the basis of his on-the-field merit, and the predominantly East Coast voting contingent won't be able to disguise their hypocrisy any longer once the name of the most accomplished Red Sox and Yankees player of his generation reaches the ballot. Once Clemens is in then, you have to let 'em all in-- Bonds, McGwire, Sosa, Palmeiro, all of 'em.
-- The members of the sports media and their pitchforks aside, I sincerely believe baseball fans don't give two shits about this report. They can't be surprised by any of it, and they're already keeping the turnstiles spinning. The fans, I think, have had it with the rumored associations, the hearsay, and steroid chatter in general. What little concern a few have is bound to be washed away by the reality and unstated conclusion of this report, which is that these performace-enhancing substances have been overwhelmingly used in a rehabilitative capacity. A long list of names and the detailed information in the report is bound to bring about, I think, the long-awaited steroid fatigue that even the media must finally be feeling.
Baseball players should still refuse to cooperate with
any investigation at
any level in regards to what should be a matter strictly of their personal privacy, but they should do what Pete Seeger did before he was charged for contempt of Congress by the House Un-American Activities committee in 1957. Instead of pleading the Fifth Amendment, and the right against self-incrimination, they should plead the First Amendment, and the right of personal liberty. By all rights, they could plead the First for the right of free association, as well. Ballplayers consort with wife-beaters, pill-poppers, adulterers, and racists, many of them already enshrined in the Hall of Fame from earlier generations, seated in the owners' luxury boxes, or both. As a matter of fact, a fella whose only crime is rubbing cream on his arms and legs might almost feel out of place in that company.
Year in review- Part 3
Isn't this thing dead yet? It
will be-- after this
final installment:
"35 things to get excited about in 2007"-- reviewing my New Year's Day optimism.
The final 11:25) Breaking out a headband on the tennis court in the spring-- Thumbs downI never bought the headband. My game really took a real hit this year. The work schedule proved incompatible and my chief opponent married himself to his training routine for marathon running. It's probably all for the best. Federer seems invincible. But I should still get that headband.
26) J.D. Drew getting booed at every home game at Fenway Park-- Thumbs downThe newest member of the Red Sox in '07, the Downy-soft Drew, received his share of jeers in Boston, and that was really great, but the baseball gods stabbed us in the ribs once again, this time by presenting the ambivalent outfielder with his first-ever championship ring.
27) More Rosie O'Donnell on "The View"-- Side thumbsRosie was riveting. For a few months, it was enjoyable to watch someone on television who actually said what she believed, and challenged the national patriarchy, but it all flamed out pretty quickly. Rosie's replacement, Sherri Shepherd, works without the filter also, but "doesn't believe in evolution, period," and
can't know for sure that the world is round.
28) Less Donald Trump everywhere-- Thumbs upYes, I took sides in the O'Donnell/Trump dust-up. I haven't seen much of the guy, though.
29) Catching that Ralph Nader documentary-- Thumbs upIt's called "An Unreasonable Man" and it's on the bookshelf. There's likely no waiting on Netflix for a weekend viewing.
30) Jeff Suppan leaving Missouri state politics-- Thumbs downI can't even remember what this means.
31) The awarding of the 2009 MLB All-Star Game to St. Louis and the Cardinals-- Thumbs upJesus, I never had to complain about something so much and for so long in my life. By July 2009, it will have been 43 years between All-Star Games for America's best baseball city, but the drought of Midsummer Classics will then come to an end. What can I bitch about now?
32) An Academy Awards telecast potentially enlivened by the presence of Eddie Murphy, Borat, and an Al Gore acceptance speech-- Even thumbsEddie lost in his category and took an early cab ride home, Borat wasn't allowed within 100 feet of a live microphone, and Gore's speech left out any big political announcements, but at least we
had an Oscar show in 2007.
33) "The Simpsons" on the big screen-- Thumbs upI got a kick out of it, and it scored big at the box office, but let's hope it doesn't lead to "The American Dad Movie."
34) A year-long "M*A*S*H" marathon on the Hallmark Channel (so far, so good)-- Thumbs upOne could make the case that I used this joke twice. (See #14) But you can't beat a winning concept-- the joke
and the marathon. As I've explained earlier, my cable's gone though, so this year, how about a M*A*S*H marathon on the CW?
35) The Cardinals' pursuit of their 11th World Championship and first ever back-to-back titles-- Thumbs downStick it in your ear.
Year in review- Part 2
Here, faster than expected due to a snow day at work, is the second installment of our look back at my
"35 things to get excited about", posted back on January 1st. Some promises delivered. Sadly, most disappointed. Some delivered, then disappointed. Some disappointed, and then had to be drowned in alcohol.
Here they are:
the next 12:13) The last odd-numbered year with George W. Bush as president-- Thumbs upI was trying to be cute with this one. Let's skip it so we don't get bogged down.
14) The Rose Parade--- Dammit, it's over already?-- Thumbs downThis is an example of some New Year's Day-themed humor that was popular about 11 and a half months ago. I find the topic of comedy history endlessly fascinating. The endless shifting of taste and time often leaves a hilarious joke or concept a more fitting piece for the time capsule. This may apply.
15) The best reality show since "Taxicab Confessions", (i.e. actor/environmentalist Ed Begley's reality program on the Home & Garden network that portrayed Ed driving his wife crazy with his "green" lifestyle)-- Thumbs downI never saw this show. It may have been good. My cable company didn't offer Home & Garden in its Des Moines lineup last winter (I'm reasonably sure), and by years-end, I no longer even have a cable subscription. If I had a nickel for every TV program or episode that I promoted on this blog, and then didn't watch, I could afford cable.
16) The first "post-Bobby" Whitney Houston album-- Thumbs downThe release date is still to be determined, but wait to exhale.
17) A 95th year on Earth for Studs Terkel-- Thumbs upThis guy's a beauty, boy. The oral historian and liberal lion put out a memoir in the fall entitled "Touch and Go," his 12th book. Like George Burns before him, I hear he's booked at Caesar's Palace for his 100th birthday.
18) The continued Latin American explosion throughout Iowa and the Midwest, helping us combat our rapidly-aging and -declining population, and spicing up the culture, in general-- Thumbs upNew census figures aren't available, but the explosion is no doubt continuing, and we're all the better for it. I hope that all brown-skin people, undocumented or otherwise, are still feeling welcome here despite the domestic terrorism employed by the INS at Swift Co. in Marshalltown, and the blithering bigots of the Republican presidential ballot, of whom I hope really do feel unwelcomed in Iowa.
19) A bull-headed Howard Dean still chairing the Democratic Party, and now having the electoral success to back the agenda of the Democratic wing-- Thumbs downDid I really write that? You people shouldn't believe a thing you read on this blog. The head of the Democratic party should be spending his time and using his position of influence to advocate for the amending of the Constitution to allow for citizen initiative lawmaking, battling tooth and nail against the crushing sphere of corporate influence on the political process, fighting tirelessly for instant runoff elections, and working relentlessly toward the abolition of the Electoral College. Dean has done none of these things, while refraining from making any policy statements whatsoever, even in connection to the war on the Iraqi people, of which he was once an outspoken and courageous opponent.
20) Four sporting heroes-- Albert Pujols, Scott Rolen, Jim Edmonds, and Chris Carpenter-- each collecting their first championship ring at Busch Stadium in April-- Thumbs upThe ceremony wasn't televised where I was, so I couldn't enjoy watching it, but for this quartet of Cardinals, the accomplishment will last a lifetime. Mine, and theirs.
21) Wrigley-ville's high expectations for Alfonso Soriano-- Thumbs downIt started out kind of fun, when Soriano began the season at a turtle's pace, but I was hoping for more frustrated Cubs fans and directional booing at the intensity level of a LaTroy Hawkins.
22) The re-opening of the I-235 eastbound ramp at ML King in Des Moines-- Please God!-- Thumbs upAgain, I missed the ceremony, but the pavement dried just in time for the Moeller TV Festival last month.
23) Dennis Kucinich forcing his Democratic caucus and primary opponents to talk about the war in their presidential campaigns-- Side thumbsHe's trying his damndest, but it's getting more difficult all the time. At the Iowa Brown & Black forum in Des Moines December 1st, after being ignored by the moderators for an hour, he
was forced (
sound warning) to ask
himself a question.
24) The final season of "Moonlighting" available on DVD in March.Aaron's borrowing it now.
Next time, on our third and final installment of "Year in Review"--
Whatever happened to that Rosie O'Donnell? Don't miss it. It's all here, it's always on (in a manner of speaking), and it's always advertisement-free information and entertainment!
Year in review- Part 1
On the first day of 2007, I published a list of
"35 things to get excited about" in the coming year. As we near its end, it's a great time to look back on what the year actually delivered, and what it didn't. The highlight for me on the calendar was probably Thanksgiving when my father and 3-year-old sister performed a moving, impromptu rendition of "Somethin' Stupid" at the dinner table. The lowlight came probably in September when I let Barry Bonds try on my new turtleneck. Let's revisit the list from January, shall we, complete with thumbs up or down? Oh, what a wild year it's been:
The first 12:1) Nancy Pelosi as Speaker of the House-- Thumbs way downWow, right out of the gate. Not only the biggest disappointment of the year, this qualified as an outright betrayal of the core principles that are espoused on this blog throughout the year. Pelosi's colossal failure as leader was punctuated this week by the announcement of another capitulation on funding for the war on the Iraqi people, and
information has surfaced that Pelosi was among the members of Congress who knew about the CIA's waterboarding techniques dating back to 2002. This was perhaps the most dismal year to date for my relationship with this ragtag outfit called the Democratic party. No longer content to stay involved with an organization in which you're considered a radical if you support habeas corpus, I left to join the Greens in the fall and we'll be pulling hard for Cindy Sheehan when she runs for Pelosi's Congressional seat in '08.
2) The theatrical release of "The Final Season" and its Iowa premieres-- Thumbs upMy premiere passes must have gotten lost in the mail, but what a ball it was when the story of Norway, Iowa baseball hit the big screen in October. A former star of the team, Tim Arp, contributed
his thoughts in a blog posting, and the film, for all its faults, proved entirely watchable.
3) John Edwards' presidential campaign, and its primary focus on the widening gap between rich and poor-- Thumbs downBoy, I sure was an optimistic fellow back in January. Maybe you can't make an issue out of something if the media refuses to follow you through the door. The Democratic presidential race has been, instead, about debating the political "experience" of the top-tier candidates and little else of substance. The final nail in Edwards' coffin gets hammered January 3rd at the Caucuses.
4) The terrific theater of Barry Bonds chasing Hank Aaron's all-time home run record-- Thumbs marginally upThis should have been more fun, but baseball's commissioner, Old Penitentiary Face, ruined it, as we suspected all along he would.
5)
The new political pressure to act on Global Warming because of the newly-revealed short-term threat to polar bears-- Thumbs downMy overestimation of the popularity of those animated Coca-cola polar bears led to this entry. The news story lasted about two days.
6) No Rick Santorum, Bill Frist, Tom DeLay, or Donald Rumsfeld-- Even thumbsAnd how sweet it was. But in their place we got the Angry White Males of the Republican presidential race and their competition to pander to the worst of our nation's collective instincts.
7) The promise of more celebrity crotch shots-- Thumbs downIt was unrealistic to think that we could match 2006. I think all of the celebrities were in rehab this year.
8) Moeller TV Festival #6-- Thumbs upLike a fine wine, ain't it?
9) Re-mastered and re-packaged James Brown classics on compact disc-- Even thumbsI'm sure they're out there, or on their way, but Brown's death didn't have quite the cultural or commercial impact on White America that I thought it would, or that it deserved. But go rent Kasi Lemmons' film, "Talk to Me," starring Don Cheadle, for a nice tribute moment to the Godfather of Soul, and for once, it's not centered around the tune "I Feel Good."
10) The prospect of Barack Obama actually telling us something about his agenda if he were to be elected president-- Thumbs downI guess we know a bit more than we did, but not much considering the size and location of Obama's pulpit, and he missed the biggest vote in the Senate all year, besides the Iraq funding measures-- the authorization for war on Iran.
11) The return of universal health care to the national policy debate-- Thumbs downUniversal health coverage can only exist under a government-run, not-for-profit system. Only Kucinich talks about that, and Democrats don't listen to him.
12) Bobby Knight as college basketball's all-time winningest coach-- it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy-- Thumbs downI gave up on college basketball four years ago when my alma mater
canned its coach for being an alcoholic. I don't think the sport ever hit my radar this year.
Tomorrow, or later this week-- Part 2 of the "Year in Review",
Did they ever open that freeway ramp near Chris' neighborhood? Stay tuned and discover.
Holiday cheer
I finished my Christmas shopping yesterday for my three-year-old sister, Katya, who had informed the family earlier in the week that she wanted a unicorn under the tree this year. Not only do unicorns not exist, I've been thinking, but even if they did, they would be a most impractical gift. They would eat you out of house and home, like any other member of the equine family, and the dog would bark day and night. I wound up buying her a stuffed unicorn, which may be what she meant all along. I can disclose my purchase information here because Katya doesn't read this blog. (She's starting to put letters together, but says she finds my work pretentious.)
In the big picture, I'm just thankful that I don't yet have to shop for her at Hot Topic.
Cardinals fans in revolt over team's offseason strategy
Sometimes magical emails just appear in my inbox. I came home with no ideas about what to write during an evening in, and then, as luck would have it, one of you did my work for me. Republished with permission in its entirety:
CM,Can you believe this shit?! We are the Cubs. Hypothetical conversations inside Cards war room:Exec 1 Who cares how lousy the team is? The fans are morons and will pay for tickets regardless.Exec 2 (laughing): No kidding, in fact let's raise prices!Exec 1 (lighting a cigar for him & E2): Capital idea.We're going to get Chris Capuano & Kyle Lohse for 20M apiece and keep Rolen & Edmonds (both will get hurt in May). Ankiel was a good story but not an everyday player. We shoulda spent the cash on Cabrera to help anchor the franchise for years with AP (editor's note: AP-- Albert Pujols). Now we're Chicago Cubs West. Dammit!KemPS You have the rights to repost this on your blog.In this same spirit, all of you are free to email your various posts to me, and I will likely print them. The only thing I'll add to the content of the email above is the suggestion that Exec 1 in the hypothetical conversation is probably using a $100 bill to light the cigars.
Ms. Couric, we're ready for our closeup...
First, Judith Miller was hoodwinked by the Bush administration on Iraq's alleged Weapons of Mass Destruction; and now,
New York Times reporter Adam Nagourney has succombed to the bright lights of Des Moines, Iowa.
Nagourney, the Times' chief political correspondent, wrote
a feature for the paper's Sunday travel section yesterday declaring to the world that Iowa's capitol city "has most certainly become cool."
Nagourney has already reserved his dinner reservation for New Year's Eve, just three nights before the Iowa Caucuses. Have you?
---
...And if that's not enough!-- Des Moines may have also just found itself located die-rectly on the real-life "Highway to Heaven." A report on Pat Robertson's
"700 Club" (
sound warning) last week revealed that a large number of evangelical groups now believe that Interstate 35, which runs north and south through Des Moines on its way between Duluth, Minnesota and Laredo, Texas, is "the way of holiness" prophecied in the Bible at Isaiah 35:8. Des Moines gay clubs and porn shops will surely be among the locations targeted for "purity sieges." Isaiah writes, "No lion shall be there, Nor shall any ravenous beast go up on it. Except for the occasional white-tail deer." This is the Word of the Lord.
---
I ran across
this item also last week. A civil engineer and author writing for the
Ladies Home Journal offered his predictions for the 20th century in the pages of the magazine in December of 1900. Some of his prognostications are preposterously off the mark, but more than a few were downright visionary. The writer didn't see much of the century himself, however, according to research harnessed from Wikipedia.com. He dropped dead in '03.
Ladies Home Journal, quite coincidentally, has been published by the Des Moines-based Meredith Corporation since 1986, thus successfully completing today's entirely-Des Moines-themed blog entry.
The Democrats' gift refund policy
During this 2007 holiday season, Republicans seem intent on participating in one of the best-known traditions (among the goyim, at least) of the Jewish celebration of Hannukah; that is, presenting a new gift each day to their loved ones. Among the GOP's political offerings to the Democrats this week was Karl Rove telling Charlie Rose, against a virtual torrent of historical evidence to the contrary, that President Bush and the White House were driven and rushed to conflict in 2002 by a war-hungry Congress. "We don't determine when the Congress votes on things. Congress does," Rove told Rose in his typically Orwellian style of distortion, referring to the Congressional authorization to bring force against the Saddam Hussein regime.
And while it's impossible to deny that the President had an entirely sycophantic Congress at his disposal in 2002-- not far removed from the way it still exists today-- Rove's claim flies in the face of all logic held by Americans educated in the claims and evidence provided by former Bush cabinet officials Richard Clarke and Paul O'Neill, as well as the widely-acknowledged and advertised aims of the influential political action organization,
Project for a New American Century, which lobbied for a military and imperial solution in Iraq dating back to the first Gulf War in 1991, and whose members reportedly dominated the policy discussions in the Oval Office in the days following the 9-11 attacks.
Taking this type of political gift into account, the first week of the holiday shopping season should have been a week in which Democrats could ask pointedly of voters: Have you had enough of these GOP lies? Instead, Americans were reminded instead that the knife still cuts both ways in Washington, as the Democratic party found itself hampered again by the dishonesty and sleaze of the Bill and Hillary Clinton political machine, that two-headed and two-ton barnacle cemented to the hull of the Democratic ship.
This time, specifically, it was that Clinton of yesteryear, William Jefferson, that got caught with his lips moving. Campaigning for his wife here in Iowa on Tuesday, Bill did some history re-writing that would make Rove blush with envy, announcing that he was opposed to the Iraq war "from the beginning," despite simultaneously admitting that he supported his wife's decision back in '02 to surrender Congressional war authority to President Bush on Iraq.
Coupled with news of a hostage standoff at Clinton campaign headquarters in New Hampshire, Americans were reminded again this week of just what polarizing figures the Clintons have always been, and what realistically they would bring to a fourth decade at the helm of the Bush/Clinton American political cabal. Citizens of every political stripe must be embarrassed by the parade of lies that continue to emanate from the two mouths of this most ethically-challenged political coupling.
On the stump during this campaign cycle, Hillary Clinton has taken to claiming that she was a vital instrument in shaping the key policies of her husband's administration, in areas as diverse as the economy and foreign affairs. This contention has been shown to be patently untrue by all journalistic accounts, except for those from within the family's most loyal inner circle. Hillary did
not have a hand in shaping global policy, or in steering the national treasury, or on anything other than political strategizing. Following the first year of Bill's governance, during which Hillary's polarizing personality and instinct for Cheney-like secrecy helped to wreck the cause of universal health insurance possibly for multiple generations to come, the First Lady's most influential role, both publicly and behind-the-scenes, was to be Mudslinger-in-Chief towards the victims of her husband's pathological, unquenchable, and maladaptive sexual appetite.
Hillary, claiming to be the most-experienced candidate in the race this year, has chosen not to run on her Senatorial record, which is as incomplete as it is unspectacular. She's attempted to paint herself as an anti-war candidate while
lapping even the Republicans in the field for political contributions from the major defense contractors. Worse yet, some of the private and congressionally-unaccountable mercenary military contractors in Iraq, like the Fluor Group, have come on board financially, as well, while the PR firm run by Hillary's top campaign strategist, union-buster Mark Penn, also represents
Blackwater USA. Well-heeled conservative organizations from across-the-board, with their plethora of specialized interests, such as furthering media deregulation, have been busy
purchasing access to the Hillary agenda.
A major American political party has arguably never been given an electoral advantage like the Democratic Party has been given by our current, incompetent president and his party, and still the Democrats show every indication that they plan to shoot themselves in the foot by putting the Clintons back at the top of the ballots nationwide. Even as candidate Barack Obama ascends to the top of the polls in Iowa, home to the first-in-the-nation caucuses, it's intellectually dishonest to think that the Democratic nomination wasn't long ago decided by the powerful Clintonistas in control of the party boardroom. The Hillary Hammer waits to strike the Obama campaign in New Hampshire, just five days after the Iowa Caucuses in early January. Clinton will easily carry New York, if not all of the Northeast; she's extraordinarily well-financed in California, and the Democratic National Committee, as we speak, is moving to decertify the delegates from Florida and Michigan because those states attempted to butt in on Iowa and New Hampshire's first-in-the-nation electoral coronation.
The Democratic party establishment picked their candidate long, long ago. They've wanted Hillary for so long, they nominated a loser in John Kerry in 2004 to clear the path. If you think that's bullshit, you're kidding yourself. The Terry McAuliffes, Bob Shrums, and James Carvilles that run the party have been content to run out the clock on Bush, rather than to actively oppose him with anything other than empty rhetoric prior to the 2008 vote. This has been best illustrated by the leadership's failure to stop the war in Iraq despite having gained control of Congressional pursestrings last November. And the real kicker is this-- even that strategy's a loser. If the Republicans have the sense to oppose Clinton in the general election with any one of the "outsider" candidates from a list of Rudy Giuliani, Mitt Romney, or Mike Huckabee, they will have pulled off the extraordinary trick of casting the Democrats in this election as the establishment party of Washington.
And the Dems, for their part, keep forgetting that Bush isn't on the ballot in 2008. American voters, after they get to know them, just might decide that they prefer either the outward rhetorical strength of Giuliani, the "project-your-favorite-quality-here" malleability of Romney, or the general human decency of Huckabee, to the "politics-as-usual" cycle-of-dishonesty from the Clinton machine. Never underestimate the American people's desire for a rigorous hand-scrubbing.
