Email change
Dear Reader,If your email address was stored in my online account, you may have received an email from "me" overnight suggesting that I've become stranded in London and that I need a $1,500 loan from you to get myself back to the Colonies. I apologize if you got this. Obviously it's not true. I won't pay you back.
All quips aside, my long-time MSN/Hotmail address has clearly been hijacked by shadowy interests. The password had been changed this morning. Later, a friend told me he had responded back to my email address in jest, an action that precipitated a personalized response from the offender. It's evident that some Tom Ripley-wanna-be is now posing as me in an attempt to bleed my financially-prosperous affiliates, and therefore, I've decided to change my email address before the man bludgeons me to death with a boat oar and dicks with my passport.
Little did this cowardly shyster with a small penis realize, however, that even without access to my email address book, I'm still able to alert millions of you to his scam through this blog. Do not-- I repeat-- DO NOT send money. I'm currently safe at home in my Des Moines apartment with the kitchen door deadbolted. I could never be stranded in London. I know a longshoreman there with both a crippling Vicodin addiction and a gambling habit that would always be willing to help stow me away aboard a luxury ocean liner of my choosing.
Again, sorry for your needless fretting over my physical and emotional well-being. My new email address is: christophermmoeller@gmail.com.
Chris
posted by CM @ 1:52 PM
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