The Chris Moeller Archives

Moeller TV Listings 5/2

The greatest talk show guest of our time, Martin Short, lights up the stage of the Ed Sullivan Theater, tonight on the Late Show.

His act will be as follows...
1) He'll come out theatrically, bowing. "Thanks for remembering," he'll bellow.
2) He'll tell Dave how great he looks, how youthful. A variation on "Is it the botox?" "Is it the ab-rolling?" Then, he will liken him to a young Hollywood star, such as Haley Joel Osment.
3) His set varies, but it will reference Paul Shaffer and their native Canada, with a brief impression of the Late Show bandleader; and it will encompass one or two show business anecdotes with other impressions. He'll be promoting his new Jiminy Glick film.
4) His finish, probably in a second segment, will be prompted by Dave, "Will you sing a song for us?" He will respond with phony humility, "Do they want me to sing?" Big applause from the audience. The microphone will be on the cushion of the second guest chair. He will ask Dave if he can sing the song to Dave on his desk. Dave will prefer that he sing it over on the stage. Marty will call Dave "Pappy," make up a story about the first time he and Dave met ("During a production of 'such and such.'")
Then he'll say "You know, in my business, or should I say, our business..." He'll do a quick Liza Minnelli impression in which he says he hopes he can finish the song despite its strong emotional content. ("Oh, silly emotion.")
5) He'll sing a song he wrote himself based on a recognizable melody.
6) A big finish to commercial, probably with dancers and/or confetti.

posted by CM @ 6:20 PM