Don't make plans
For the first time, the Moeller TV Festival will be conducted in two installments this year. In honor of our 10th Anniversary, Part I will be July 23rd in Cedar Rapids at Aaron’s house, and Part II will be at my Des Moines habitation in November or early December. It’s all very exciting to contemplate except when you consider that the world is going to end this Saturday.Well, perhaps not exactly. But a major downward turn commences in just five days. If you live in Des Moines, you might have seen the billboard on the city's east side overlooking the McVicar Freeway, but it's not only in that location. Eighty-nine-year-old Harold Camping and his international Family Radio ministry have been buying up billboards all over the country announcing the coming Day of Judgment.
I won’t bore you with the specifics of his calculation because I don't want to have to study it hard enough to explain it. But the short of it is that the divine Rapture will take place May 21, 2011, and for those not swept up to heaven, the event will be followed by 153 days of human suffering, earthquakes, open graves, hellfire, and what-not, before the world is swallowed whole by the Lord on October 21st. (Baseball teams, set your pitching rotations.) The early departed will miss the first half of the TV Fest though so too bad for them. It's going to be a luau theme.
The timeline confused me at first. I saw the billboard weeks ago that advertised the May date, but later I saw a dude wearing a sandwich board on the I-235 ramp at ML King that had the October date and it seemed like we were conflicting. Now I know. You've got your hell on Earth and your hell in hell. There are two dates. It's like a TV Festival in that way. Reverend Camping was wrong once before though. He misread the numbers the first time and came up with a date of September 6, 1994. Oops, that's some egg on his face there. Measure twice. Cut once.
Apocalyptic doomsayers are batting oh-for-'a lot' so far, but Rev. Camping has a calculator and a dream. I'm not sure what he'll do when he wakes up a goat on Sunday morning, but I have a guess: He’ll claim he misjudged the numbers again and he'll come up with a new date of prophecy, and he’ll ask for more contributions for his church.
His flock is invited to Moeller TV Festival X, Part I-- again, it's Saturday, July 23rd, at Aaron's house in Cedar Rapids. Wear a Hawaiian shirt for the luau and bring your calculators. It's free to attend, with a meal provided, so it would make for a perfect day if you've given away all of your money and possessions.
posted by CM @ 8:36 PM
2 Comments:
Not even Judgement Day would shut this down. If God has any brain at all, he'll wait till 2012. I'm there and have had my Hawaiian tank top for some time now.
Mayra...that is awesome! It's a sad, sad day when we can't even be on the same page about when the world will end. You'd figure the bible would be clearer. lol
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