The Chris Moeller Archives

I can see clearly now...

Iowa's Attorney General Tom Miller filed consumer fraud charges Wednesday against a Fairfield, IA outfit called Vision Improvement Technologies. The company markets something called "The See Clearly Method," a program of video tapes and eye exercises they say will naturally improve your vision. They send you a series of videos and workbook assignments that help you to focus your eyes better, the idea being that the muscles in the eye are just like any other muscle in the body that needs to be continually conditioned to be improved.

I know this much about the company because I participated in the program myself. Two summers ago, I had grown sick of wearing my glasses after about six months. My vision had only deteriorated in life to the point that I needed help driving, and enjoying TV, theater and sporting events. My computer screen at work was well within my range of focus, and my daily life was only slightly harrassed by poor vision. I was a prime candidate for modest, but meaningful improvement, I thought.

The program had a 30-day, money-back trial offer so I gave it that much time. After a month, my vision had-- I repeat, had improved. I estimate that on the eye charts I had improved my focus by four to six inches. The problem was-- four to six inches is meaningless on the highway; I was giving up 30 to 45 minutes of each day doing the exercises; and I was about to be billed $350 for a package of tapes, booklets, and charts that seemed to me to be worth about 40 bucks. So I photocopied the eye charts at work, and then sent the package back. In all, I invested about $10 for shipping expenses both ways.

At the press conference in Des Moines yesterday, Miller said the state had received dozens of complaints about the company from people who had attempted to get refunds on the program. When I heard this, my first reaction was-- these consumers were lazy. And I'm not surprised. I consider myself a pretty disciplined and patient person, and I struggled to keep exercising. What chance do these other poor saps have?

I am convinced that the system, while overpriced, can be successful. Their fundamental argument is indisputable-- wearing glasses will not improve your vision. They are a crutch that will only cause your eyes to deteriorate more in adjustment. You know this if you are a regular wearer of glasses-- the more you wear them, the more dependent upon them you become.

Miller confessed that he found five customers who believed the techniques worked. Five out of how many, who knows? He dismissed their testimonies by saying, "There can be a placebo effect in any kind of situation." Of course, what's he going to say otherwise?

Don't doubt for a second the powerful political influence of the medical lobby. The AMA drones secure their little nest eggs with drugs and surgical procedures, while chasing patients away from natural cures like acupuncture. They simultaneously acknowledge, though, that the human body is, by and large, a remarkably efficient, self-righting machine.

And then there was Tom Miller, standing before the capitol's press corps, defending the ophthalmology industry--- his "crutches" wrapped around his ears, with lenses so distorted that they would probably afford healthy eyes a view of Saturn's rings. It was like listening to the town drunk tell you how to stop boozing.

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I live in a kind of hippie neighborhood. (Sherman Hill, Des Moines, USA, Mad props to the Dirrty Central!) It was starting to rain as I drove home from work tonight. A couple blocks away from my apartment, there were some middle-age women out in the yard doing some sort of interpretive dance. I thought to myself, those chicks need to get out of the rain. But then I thought, what if they're causing the rain?

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I'm optimistic about a new show on the UPN fall schedule called, "Everybody Hates Chris." The title, of course, is a play on "Everybody Loves Raymond." It's from executive producer Chris Rock, and we're to believe it's basically about the comedian's life growing up as the only black kid in an otherwise all-white school. Very intriguing. The problem, as I see it though, could be in the quality of life for people like me. People named Chris. Are people going to be taunting me with this title all the time? That's the last thing I need is another potential avenue for people to taunt me.

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President Bush got his energy bill passed this week. The oil lobby loves it. Half the Democrats caved on it. No surprises. The bill did succeed in extending Daylight Savings Time by another month. Into November, I think. It doesn't matter to me when we change the clocks. I always waste that extra hour anyway. Last year was the worst offense to date. I used it to cook twenty "3 Minute Eggs." Dumb.

posted by CM @ 8:08 PM